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The Most Blessed Side of Prayer

Years before when I had faced similar tragedies alone, I always found comfort in my suffrage through prayer. Upon arrival back in this space again… well not really arriving, I had been here for years now… back at it again and my passion was dying out of me quickly. I knew no other recourse of action than  prayer, so I set out on a journey that frightened me immensely. I took a path that I knew was sure to get me out of my tragedy despite the turmoil of it all. I took a special course of action that I knew came with guaranteed results. Though I did not know what the results would be, I knew I would be happier finding myself over on that side of life versus remaining stuck in the smut I was already in. So! I tried.

That Many Years Ago

I can’t believe it’s been that many years ago since I first started journaling my prayers. I can’t believe it’s been that many years ago since I needed God with an urgency like I did back then. I can’t believe it’s been that many years ago since God changed my life for good.

Wow.

That Many Years Ago.

It has been that many years ago.

Reborn then.

Here I am now, doing it again…

Strongholds. What Are They? What Can I Do About Them?

Greetings Ladies!!!

During a heavy prayer session about a month ago, God relayed to me that I have been a stronghold in my relationship.

Let’s just stop here.

That blew my MIND!!!! 

WOW!

I was sooo very thoroughly blown away that I just sat there for a  while and wept. My heart was SOOOO broken! Never would I have thought that my own actions (or even lack of action in some cases) were the cause of such MAJOR chaos in my life.

11:40pm

Father —

I am learning to be grateful for all that you have blessed me with. I don’t always arrive, but Lord, I am trying.
I am learning to be grateful for all you protect me from, and though I’m not always understanding, Lord, I am trying.
God, I am trying to find rest in all that you have promised, and Lord … you know I’m not the most patient, but Lord, I am trying.
Lord, I doubt myself. I doubt me very often. I doubt my power. I doubt my strength, and even with all my faith in you, somehow I am still banking on me. Somehow I am still “faithing it” on what I bring.

[Be still and KNOW I AM God! 11:45pm]

God, you are amazing. My truth. My strength. My strong tower. You keep me, and for that, I thank you. God, you bless me, and for that, I thank you. You are the lifter of my head, and for that, I love you. Thank you for being amazing, for keeping me, for lifting me up, for loving me.

God, these lessons you have taught have been wonderful and I am truly grateful. You blessed me!